My cats, my family

"You must keep the cats away from the baby."

"You should give away your cats."

"Make sure you don't let your cats get close to the baby; they could be jealous or they could give your baby asthma."

For every well-meaning relative or friend who's given me unsolicited advice about cats and babies, my face freezes and I force a similarly well-meaning smile to appear because to open my mouth in response would be as hazardous as exposing oneself to a nuclear fallout.

I would gladly hunt and shoot down the person who first uttered the last comment which made its way around to my side of the park, if I had that much time to spare. I think pets in general would be more afraid of the wailing and noise that a newborn baby makes than develop any longlasting jealousy towards it. As with human children, it is to be expected that pets would experience a certain amount of neglect once a new addition to the family has arrived. How pets and the rest of the human household react to that new addition is how one introduces and integrates that new baby into the family.

So what if there's a little jealousy involved? Don't tell me that everyone you know is a saint and that they weren't a little jealous of their new sibling when they were first born.

I have been doing some reading and have learned that how cats react to the newcomer largely depends on what kind of cat it is. The timid, nervous cat who is liable to run away at the sign of new visitors and is really only happy with you is the most difficult to deal with, likely be jealous and to spray in the places used by new mother and baby. The devoted cat, the one who follows you around and wants to join in all you do will be the one most easily hurt but will also be the one most likely to enlarge his affections to include said new baby. The easiest cat to deal with will be the one with whom you have a somewhat impersonal relationship with, the kind who eats and sleeps, accepts petting when it suits him and generally goes his own way. If his routine remains unchanged, he should be no trouble at all.

Fortunately for us, we have cats that fall into each category. Trixie is the first, timid with strangers but oozing with affection for me. I don't imagine she would be jealous with the baby as she would be hiding behind the couch should the baby be wailing. And she has not a bone of malice in her body: she allows Pixel to manhandle her and is such a wuss she's even afraid to stand up to the wet blanket of the family, Meg.

Trixie in the early days at our rented apartment.

Pixel is the dog of the family; he is really a dog in cat's clothing. He follows us everywhere, comes when he's called and offers his belly to us or visitors whenever we walk in the front door. When he discovers that his "twin" or any of us are not around, he will meow the house down in search of the missing culprit. I think he may be more curious than jealous, and his nature being a big brown fuzzy teddy bear wrapped in dog's fur but born in a cat's body, he will take to the baby and may even want to cuddle up to it when he figures she's another member of the family.

Pixel in the days before we adopted him, lounging around the ground floor of my parents' condo unit.

Meg is the cat who's ... a cat. Sleeps all the time, appears only at mealtimes, will want to sit on my lap if I let her, is up for a game if the string is bandied about but other than that, like I said, she sleeps all the time. I don't think bringing a baby into the family will affect her in any way. Other than the fact that her spot next to me on the bed may be taken up by the new member.

Meg when she had Garfield to keep her company.

Some are still trying to convince me that putting babies and cats together is a no-no. I know of some people who've given their cats away as soon as their new baby has arrived. It saddens me that people who've taken the responsibility of caring for a cat and welcomed it in to their home could just as easily discard the cat when a baby comes along.

Time and again our pets prove that they are loyal and trusting friends, accepting us even easier than some of our human counterparts do. My cats are my babies, my companions. I treat them like my family and accord them the love and respect as such. They in turn comfort me when I'm down, share in my happiness and of course, occasionally irritate me to no end, as most normal family members do. And since I picked them off the street (all three were strays), I think of myself as being responsible for their welfare. Unless there's absolutely no way I can keep all three with me, baby notwithstanding, I wouldn't dream of putting them out on the streets again. Except maybe for Meg and even then not out on the streets but in a new home. But then again, that's a different story altogether.